A Song For You

Rindu mak, rindu ayah. Rindu nak sembang ngan aslinda, rindu nak fangirling dengan mirah, aisyah. Rindu nak buli faiz. Rindu nak peluk Farid kuat kuat. Rindu nak buli cemenit, kacau dia main. Tiap kali angkat barang berat teringat kat ayah, ayah sangat cool, sangat dependable. Rindu ayah. Rindu mak, nak cerita pasal abangtan kakak. Nak tunjuk hiphop monster tu kat mirah ngan aisyah. Nak bawak depa pi bukit dumbar jalan-jalan. Rindu semua, rindu Penang.

U.S.R.A.H

Ini Sejarah Usrah

Something

I hate living a life of a puppet.
Doing what we're told.
Shaping into what we're not.
Living in the stagnant atmosphere suffocate me

101415

Waiting | 기다려

I don't mind living with people with different sets of morals and beliefs, but one thing that tires me the most is when they expect you to fit in the crowd. Forcing you into something that you're not in, questioning every decisions that you've made and yet to make. But I don't want you guys to leave me alone nor do I want to upset you guys with my weaknesses. If only you could understand me more, I sincerely wish you do.

Min Yoongi~

Bajet Suga, asyik cakap pasal suara dia ja.
Taula suara sedap
-,-

Procrastinate #2

Waktu nak kena siapkan assignment la rasa macam nak bukak youtube, dengar lagu Britney Spears, nak tengok fancafe update, nak belajar hangul, nak update blog, nak tengok perkembangan terkini cinta hati. Pastu nak buat poem bagai, nak fikir idea untuk next donation project lagi. 

Ini juga dikira sebagai procrastinate eh?

Procrastinate

I'mma gonna live forever

Say I'mma gonna live forever~

*NO YOU WON'T* 

I used to be a hardcore fan of a German rock band. *guess what*

And they're gay//

My life was a total lie

Bye

But then, I think I still like their songs duh

After 5 years

ahh, Strify

I was your hardcore fan back then, 

Still hoping that you guys will perform together as a group. :(

BYE

뒤돌아보지 말고

My stars shine bright

So bright so far

And the morning sun sets up high

7 am and I'm ready

Even when the world turns their backs on me

I have you

Clenched my fist and be brave

Your voice accompanied me

Putting my beats into rest

Just smile

10月 7日

kimi no koto

Waking up,
Be bright, search for meaning
in all these pleasure
Determine your goal
and work for it
As the days passed by
Remind yourself, don't let
the fears engulf you
Don't let the trash
torn you apart
Be brave
and stand for yourself


10月 5日

Throwback Em-Mar-Rest-Em

Waktu hari manifesto BWP, aku penah kena bash ngan sorang budak perempuan ni. She asked about the connection of washing machine and Biro Akademik, (one of my manifesto was about to set up washing machine in the hostel). And I was like, ohh. okay. "Mestila banyak kaitan, blablabla(I can't remember clearly what did I say lol)" And honestly, I didn't feel offended at all. We've never spoke to each other before, nor do I have enemies at school. erm. well, I think I have none. I THINK. xP

But after the incident, agak ramai jugakla orang yang backed up aku. Kawan kelas, kawan BWP, kawan homeroom, roommate semua. Dan tak kurang jugak yang butthurt bagi pihak aku. SORRY GUYS BUT THIS IS IT. And then mai kat aku cakap budak perempuan tu camni camtu, aku actually rasa kesian kat budak tu. She's actually a second intake student. Probably sebab tu la ramai yg backlashed dia balik sebab kacau student kesayangan cikgu-cikgu serta para pelajar maktab. They made such a huge fuss over the incident, when I thought of nothing. Like honestly, NOTHING guys. IT WAS NOTHING. Dia tanya soalan je pun. Maybe nada dia menyindir, tapi okay je lah. manifesto kannn, mestilah ada sesi bash-membash. I took it on a professional level lah, tapi serius kesian, sampai habis maktab ada lagi orang yang cakap pasal insiden tu kat aku. Lol. Kenapa aku tak rasa apa-apa, tapi depa semua rasa sakit hati. erm. Conclusionnya, saya minta maaf pada pelajar yang tersebut tu. Saya tak rasa mahu cari gaduh dengan awak pun, tetapi mungkin banyak berita buruk tersebar sebab manifesto tu. ahahha. Minta maaf. Semoga berjaya dunia dan akhirat amiin. K yang tu ja, ada jugak orang yang undi aku rupanya hahaha. adalah~ dalam undian ketiga terbanyak dalam kalangan student perempuan ahhahaha lol K.

Tapi dalam banyak banyak, aku paling tak suka part pakai blazer waktu perhimpunan rasmi. uwahghgfjwg. Dewan tu dah la panas gila. Ada sekali tu, aku menangis sebab makcik jual ais kacang tak bagi ais kacang kat aku. aku menangis teruk kut. Ya lah, aku tunggu punya lama depan dia, ada kah patut dia bagi orang lain dulu. Takpalah makcik, saya anggap makcik tak nampak saya sebab saya ni kecik sangat . hmm,


                                                                           
                                                                                                               8月17日

lololo

I've been spamming my twitter account with fangirling post, BTS, and tons of bangtan trash. I feel bad to my irl followers, lol. like, that's kinda embarassing and hmm, idk how to put it into words so yeah.

 And this means that I basically have nowhere to write my random thoughts lol. Apart from my diary and hp notes. But it seriously is no fun because I need to feel as if someone is reading my thoughts so I can actually feel better. Lol weirdo. 

Maybe I should post them on this blog? 

But they're usually just a few lines, 

but then, nothing can be done about it. 

So I guess this is okay.

What should I do after all.? hmm

Normal

What is your definition of normal?

Not sure though, but I've stuck with this statement for about five month.

Nvm, let's just leave that. someday it will pop out of nowhere, and I'll be left wondering who I am again. I want to do whatever I want to, whatever I like to. But then, my time, my friends, my body - it feels like I've been controlled. I feel stuck. I regret myself taking this course, it took the tolls on myself.
Where is the solitude that I always anticipated for? Why do people ruin it?

Waiting
For a while
and now that I look back
I've lost track of time
Searching for you

The memories that was carved upon my hearts
In the midst of the silent nights
All I can hear is
Your whispering voice
Singing to me
Sending chills down my spine
Your innermost thoughts
Where can I find you?
Nowhere to found

Loneliness caught onto me
Awake from dream
Suffocating
I don't want to be back
to reality
Where you're not there
                                               
                                                                             9月 29日